Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
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In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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