Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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