My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize