We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
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