called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Do vagina's smell?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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