So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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