I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
