it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
