apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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