New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
