Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
