school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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