dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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