Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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