That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
