On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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