remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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