You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
