he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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