It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
