The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
