I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
