The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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