Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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