I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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