We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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