:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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