I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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