his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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