Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
