Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Randomize