What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize