It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize