new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
tell me about the fingering
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