I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
