It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
