You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
This show inspires me to have sex in space
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
We need to get me chipped asap
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
