His pubic hair was longer than his dick
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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