The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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