i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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