i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize