i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Small penises have feelings too.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
