Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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