I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
