you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
