i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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