pop tarts are not kleenex
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
