We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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