im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
