He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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